**crop, paper, scissors**

i finally went out for an evening last night. anne and i went to a crop at a kick-butt scrapbook store in Independence called Runs with Scissors. we had the best time not only at the crop but on the ride over and back visiting. good friends are the best at that. they have the most amazing chairs and crop tables that were completely covered with cutting mats. they also had a Cricut Expressions die-cut machine with all the cartriges, that i would love to have. sadly, i didn't take the time to play with it last night so i will make sure i do it next time.

anne made us dinner....turkey with feta and cheddar cheese. it was heaven. we also took other GBS-friendly snacks. i now have a recipe for delicious almonds that i have to try. thanks mama!! ♥♥

i loved the american idol finale show. i was taping it on TIVO and waited to start it an hour after it began so i could fast forward through all the stuff that wasn't performed by adam or kris. but.....it got me and i watched the whole damn thing. want proof?.....Queen Latifa, you SO should not have worn that black body suit. gasp. but, my boy won. i wasn't as shocked as "it was rigged" and "total upset" screamers, i think he just got the danny votes. anyway, yay!















david cook came back and performed the song "permanet" that he wrote about his brother's suffering due to brain cancer. the song was written and released on his first album. his brother died about a month or so ago. i have no idea how he got up there and performed that song but i know that i was.....BAWLING. stories like that kill me. a long time ago he had agreed to attend a cancer walk. his brother died the day before and he went to the walk anyway. he spoke about how he could not 'not' attend and how important the research for cancer was. i thought that was pretty cool.
















life has been a little frantic over here for me. i probably make it harder than it needs to be. i'm just sayin'. bailey is graduating on the 4th of june and i have been planning her party, her gift, and sending out announcements and invitations.

my good friend Sara made the invitations for the grad party. i emailed her a "general" version of it and then she did her 'thang'. she changed the colors to match the actual book, did all the adjustments to fit 2 on a page so i could print them on photo paper myself, and she even elongated the hair on the boy in the hot air balloon to make it look more like a girl. she then added all the altered information to match the event. i couldn't have asked for a better invitation. thanks Sara!! click on the invitation to enlarge it so you can read it.



















in the last 11 months there have been a lot of changes in my home, my family, and me. i have finally made it to a place where i feel "clear". i don't know if that makes sense but it feels good to know who i am and what i want and be happy with that.

i ran across this song by Kelly Clarkson months ago and it fit how i have felt about myself. i don't know what this song is to her but there are parts of it that ring true for me. it's a great song and somehow speaks to me. it is not about a person but about me and a process and change.

And I Don't Know
This Could Break My Heart Or Save Me
Nothing's Real
Until You Let Go Completely
So Here I Go With All My Thoughts I've Been Saving
So Here I Go With All My Fears Weighing On Me

Three Months And I'm Still Sober
Picked All My Weeds But Kept The Flowers
But I Know It's Never Really Over

And I Don't Know
I Could Crash And Burn But Maybe
At The End Of This Road I Might Catch A Glimpse Of Me
So I Won't Worry About My Timing, I Want To Get It Right
No Comparing, Second Guessing, No Not This Time

Three Months And I'm Still Breathing

Been A Long Road Since Those Hands I Left My Tears In But I Know
It's Never Really Over, No

Wake Up

Three Months And I'm Still Standing Here
Three Months And I'm Getting Better Yeah
Three Months And I Still Am

Three Months And I'm Still Breathing
Three Months And I Still Remember It
Three Months And I Wake Up

Three Months And I'm Still Sober
Picked All My Weeds But Kept The Flowers

and on that happy note i will get out of here and back to trying to organize my thoughts for this party. i am so freaked that i might forget something. wish me luck.


peace.